Perhaps a little of the answer lies in the following silly couplets of what real friendship is all about.
- When you are sad -- I will help you plot revenge against the sorry jerk who made you sad.
- When you are blue -- I will try to dislodgewhatever is choking you.
- When you smile -- I will know you are thinking of something that I would probably want to be involved in.
- When you are scared -- I will rag you aboutit every chance I get until you're Not.
- When you are worried -- I will tell youhorrible stories about how much Worse it could beuntil you quit whining.
- When you are confused -- I will try to useonly little words.
- When you are sick -- Stay the hell away from me until you are well again. I don't want whatever you have.
- When you fall -- I will laugh at your clumsy butt, but I'll help you up.
This is my oath.... I pledge it to the end.'Why?' you may ask; 'because you are my friend'. Friendship is like peeing in your pants, everyone can see it, but only you can feel the true warmth.
To me, this sentiment says a lot because real friendship isn't always hugs, smiles and chocolates. I remember hearing about a couple whose baby stopped breathing. They gently lifted the infant and dashed to the hospital, holding the small struggling baby up to the ER nurse. Instantly she grabbed the child and held it upside down, smacking its back and bottom. The baby began to scream and the horrified parents snatched back their child but the nurse realized that was what the baby needed to survive.
A true friend gives you what you need, not what you want. C. S. Lewis said, "We are bidden to ‘put on Christ,’ to become like God. That is, whether we like it or not, God intends to give us what we need, not what we now think we want."
It's a real gift to find a friend who understands this concept and is willing to laugh at you and shake you up a little bit when you need it.